172-year-old paranoid, arrested development scientist still not dead yet
T'Valdra, Qirbus System, T'Valdra Allied Stars
T'Valdra officials have confirmed that Monak Vigon, the 172-year old government physics researcher with paranoid and arrested development traits, is indeed still alive.
The scientist gained public notoriety several years ago when he was famously dismissed from his position as physics researcher due to poor performance, but then immediately re-instated after the government realised it did not have enough influence to recruit a replacement.
The move was expected to be temporary, but a number of factors led to Vigon remaining in post, as T'Valdranite official Rhass told our reporters:
"It was a perfect storm, really.
We thought Vigon would go... naturally, but someone over at the Society Department accidentally researched Cell Revitalisation III so that set us back another 5 years.
Meanwhile our government has been focusing too much on ploughing all of our influence into expansion and frontier outposts, so we can't recruit any new talent.
We've been left in this untenable position of trying to decide whether it's worse to have Vigon or no-one at all running the physics department. It's hard to tell to be truthful."
Responding to the news that he is still exists, Vigon told reporters outside his makeshift hovel;
"OUR ELECTED GOVERNMENT ARE LIZARD PEOPLE! LITERAL REPTILIAN LIZARD PEOPLE!"
> More accurate reporting from Xan’dolf Leexidanaca and Ashley Easterbrook could not be possible.