Politics

No-One Informed About Native Rebellion on Sector-Governed World

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After months of strikes and protests, the native plantoid population of Linneaus has taken up arms and besieged the planet’s administration facilities early Wednesday morning.

The natives, which call themselves ‘Dussin’, have struggled with stellar culture shock since their integration into the Luuhma Combine three years ago. Over the last six months there have been a total of five strikes and three demonstrations in the name of plantoid rights.

Unfortunately for the protesters, their planet is located in a sector and governed mostly through sector management. Thus, word of the rioting plantoids never reached the High Queen, Ehdr den Luuhma.

However, this may have changed since yesterday, when several Dussin rebels armed themselves with stolen Hunter-Killer Drones and marched on the planetary capital.

The Queen has yet to make a statements regarding the rebellion, but the rebels are convinced that they will have soon gained enough notoriety to catch her attention.

The infamous Buttercup Huckleberry, esteemed leader of the rebels, explained the motivation of the rebels in an exclusive interview with Xenonion: "We didn't want it to turn out this violent, we never did. But the government just wouldn't listen. We knew we had to do something drastic to get their attention.

Huckleberry’s stated her goal was for plantoids to have full citizenship and leadership rights. When asked how the Dussin could achieve this, she continued, leaves trembling: "I'm not very well-read in politics and stuff but I guess some government officials will take up this matter with the Queen. Or perhaps they can change that policy without asking the Queen… It doesn't really matter; all I know is that we’ll keep the capital under siege until new legislation has been passed. We will never give up on our cause!"

When contacted by Xenonion, representatives from the Luuhma Combine denied that a rebellion was occurring on Linneaus. No further response has been issued by the Luuhma Combine or Queen.

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Subconscious Consensus Unable to Reach Consensus on Definition of Consensus

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The T'Valdra Allied Stars Congress has announced it is delaying a planned overhaul of the planet’s voting system from direct democracy to subconscious consensus.

The reform, originally introduced 35 years ago, has been plagued with problems despite an overwhelming majority of the T’Valdra population backing the plan in 298 consecutive referenda.

Image: T’Valdranite official-elect Ik’thon’ban, Chair of the 111th Congressional Committee on Implementing the Subconscious Consensus.

Image: T’Valdranite official-elect Ik’thon’ban, Chair of the 111th Congressional Committee on Implementing the Subconscious Consensus.

Chairing the 111th congressional committee on the subconscious consensus, T'Valdranite official Ik'thon'ban stated: "The consensus of the consensus committee is that we do not have a consensus on the definition of consensus, and as such we do not have a consensus to proceed with the implementation of the subconscious consensus."

A further referendum on whether to delay the subconscious consensus reform is scheduled for tomorrow, dependent upon whether Ik’thon’ban can remain chair of the congressional committee, a position to which he is elected to on a daily basis.

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Area Planet Accidentally Insults Fallen Empire

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Galactic diplomats are scrambling this Thursday to try and minimize metaphorical and physical fall-out after an area planet accidentally insulted the millennia old Vroth Combine, a notoriously aggressive stagnant ascendancy.

The insult was issued from High Nest, the only planet of the newly formed Caawian Cooperative, an Avian bureaucracy that surreptitiously discovered FTL-travel 2 months ago.

In an official press release this morning, Caawian Cooperative Leader Supreme Coo explained: “This is all really awkward. We’re new to the galactic neighbourhood and just trying to flex our wings. Unfortunately it took us some time to register the Vroth weren’t a pre-sentient reptilian species as were initially led to believe.”

Image: Supreme Coo addresses issues a press release from High Nest.

The press conference was cut short after Coo became distracted by a shiny object and began furiously pecking at it.

The Vroth have not yet responded diplomatically, but unconfirmed reports have begun filtering through the neural net that several of their 200k battleship fleets have begun to amass outside Caawian borders.

Our news team reached out to High Nest for a further statement on the above, but unfortunately all comm links in the area have been severed. Prior to this, Supreme Coo had stated he was “confident” the Cooperative’s three corvettes would keep their homeworld safe.

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