Species That Doesn’t Wear Clothes Awkwardly Attends Federation Meeting
NEWS | THELMAR UNION | 12.07.2259
Report by Ashley Easterbrook, Xenonion | ⏱︎ 5 minute read
The Just Alliance’s first federation meeting following the admission of the Bwauki Republic was abruptly adjourned yesterday, after it emerged the avian species doesn’t wear any clothes.
The meeting had been set to focus on the construction of a new joint federation fleet, but proceedings quickly derailed after delegates became distracted by what one witness described as “a frankly astonishing number of cloaca.”
“Diversity is key tenet of any galactic partnership,” pointedly-clothed Just Alliance representative Slig told Xenonion. “But no-one needs to see that while mingling over breakfast pastries.”
Insiders report that Bwauki ascension to the federation had been fast-tracked based on a digital application wherein photos of the species were tastefully cropped at the torso.
Chaos erupted during the first meeting when a Bwauki representative stood to deliver a passionate speech on taxation reform with his reproductive organs gyrating vigorously in tandem. Several delegates retched, while one arthropod visibly shed their outer carapace in distress.
Security forces intervened and attempted to drape federation banners over the confused Bwauki, before escorting them to a side chamber and adjourning the meeting.
At the time of press, representative Slig confirmed that while the federation remains committed to receiving the Bwauki’s alloys for fleet construction, all future diplomatic engagements will be conducted virtually, or if in person “with a tasteful screen and some strategically placed large ferns.”
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